Understanding Through Hurt

When we hurt someone or someone hurts us… what are the reasons for it? 

Why do people choose the words they do?  Why do these words hurt so much?

The enemy of our soul knows the exact why to hurt us.  He knows what words to use.  He knows what words stop us in our tracks.  And he will use anyone to say them...  Some do not believe this but what words scream out for you to speak in the midst of conflict?

What voice are you listening to in the midst of hurt?  Do we absorb those hurtful words- those words that sometimes come out of no where like a sniper shot.   Why now? Why come after you?  What did you deserve to get such words?  Or were you just in the path at the wrong time?  Or is it because you are a child of God?  

Why did people hurt each other? Do they hurt us because of something in their past? Do they lack understanding and compassion? Are they suffering themselves? Do they lack self-esteem? Are they so hard hearted that it has made their brain hard as well. The brain seems to not know or even care what is coming out of their mouth.  Not only that but have seemed to forgotten has badly they have treated you.  You confront them on it and they seem to have to no recollection of those times.   They seem to even think they have done you some kind of good service by doing what they did.  They had some reason to say and do the things they did....   


Beware of such folks... forgive them but keep them arm distance away from you.  Some people believe to forgive is to forget... and I tell you: You are to forgive where they have "pained" you so so the pain doesn't fester and become infected and cause you resent and hate and become revengeful and drag your soul to hell but you don't forget.  God tells us we must forgive others or we will not be forgiven besides you want to go to hell for someone's wrong? You want to live in a prison of your own hate while they walk around free?  WHY?  Christians aren't their own... not only do they have to answer to God for their wrongs but we should feel sorry for those who hurt us because they will have to answer to God because we are His.

I have found we must be careful who we lean towards and trust.  We must be careful who we look to for affirmation.  Some people will take the very words you have spoken in confidence and use them against you.  Learn from those situations.... just because people give you tokens of their thoughts you don't have to spill your thoughts as well especially if you don't want what you have shared to be given to other people.   

Where is the mind when we "expectantly or unexpectedly" get hurt by someone?  Is it all based on emotions and the natural tendency to get even, flee, to get on the side of offense or defense....?  Some people, particularly men have a difficult time pin pointing why they feel a certain way so they cover it over with some other defense... some so afraid of what others might think of them lie and lie and lie and when the lies don't do anything for them anymore they RUN.  That is why is is so important to have loving respectful honest conversation with our spouse.  If they don't feel safe in sharing their feelings and feel as if their feelings will be used against them then you are pushing that person AWAY! 

What is our natural tendency to do when we get hurt?  Do we "stuff it" only for it to blow up later.   Do we let it burden us?  Do we take it to heart?  Where does the mind GO when it gets hurt?  Do we believe what people say more then what God has told us?  Do we hold onto the hurt or give it God?  Do we say, "HERE GOD take it" but on our way out, pick it up again?
 Why do you think God’s word says to love Him with all your heart and mind?

God says to not strike back in word or action for God has total knowledge of the situation.  TURN the other cheek but it is difficult to do when we don't put our focus on God and our spiritual scale is off kilter....  God emphasis on our lives need to be more then people's words and actions- good or bad.  For we will not stand before people but God when God takes an account of our life.

Matthew 5:22 "But I say, if you are angry with someone, you are subject to judgment! If you call someone an idiot, you are in danger of being brought before the high council. And if you curse someone, you are in danger of the fires of hell."
 
Some people might want to seek an explanation but depending on the person we might not want an explanation.   We might humbly say we are sorry for whatever offense we might have caused and if nothing else is said- maybe it is best to let it go without an explanation.  When you talk to someone about how they hurt you, don't get sucked into even more damaging emotions and feelings... some people have a special ability to make you feel worse after speaking to them....  If you know that is the tendency with such a person it is best to let it go.   Do what you know is right... God knows... God knows... God knows...  Honor God and at the right time God will honor you.

When we get hurt, not of any fault of our own, are we gaining some kind of understanding or getting a little taste of what Christ went through for us?
So the actions and whipping tongues hurt for a little while but as long as we are "reminded" what Christ took upon himself we will not lose faith. We will not give into negative thoughts that breed resentment, anger, fear, frustration, revenge and/or wrath but we will hold fast to the tower of our strength and be encouraged by the Holy Spirit. Grace and forgiveness will flow from us- replacing the natural tendencies that only come from human understanding.

Remember everything not done in love is worthless. (1 Corinthians 13:3) Ask yourself, will what I do and say be out of love or out of pointless selfishness and/or vengeance?  Ask yourself- do you belong to yourself or God?

Words can be an ally or an enemy according to Proverbs.

• "A gentle answer turns away wrath, but harsh words stir up anger."
• "Gentle words bring life and health; a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit."
• "Kind words are like honey-sweet to the soul and healthy for the body."
• "A person’s words can be life-giving water, waters of true wisdom are as refreshing as a bubbling brook."
• "Words satisfy the soul as food satisfies the stomach; the right words on a person’s lips bring satisfaction."

1 Peter 3:2 states to wives: "Your godly lives will speak to them better than any words. They will be won over by watching your pure, godly behavior."  BUT I believe we all can use this verse as well.   Words sometimes just get in the way but unselfish godly actions speak a lot louder then words.
 
 Ephesians 5:25 says "And you husbands must love your wives with the same love Christ showed the church." (Ephesians 5:28) "Husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man is actually loving himself when he loves his wife." ( 1 Peter 3:7) "In the same way, you husbands must give honor to your wives. Treat her with understanding as you live together"
Love is what? God’s word says love is:
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 "Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. Love does not demand its own way. Love is not irritable, and keeps no record of when it has been wronged. It is never glad about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance."

Jesus says this in Matthew 22:37-39: "You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul and all your mind, This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: Love your neighbor as yourself."

Jesus says in Matthew 5:43 "You have heard the law of Moses says, ‘Love your neighbor’ and hate your enemy. But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you! In that way, you will be acting as true children of your Father in heaven. For he gives his sunlight to both the evil and the good, and he sends rain on the just and on the unjust, too. If you love only those who love you, what good is that? Even corrupt tax collectors do that much. If you are kind only to your friends, how are you different from anyone else? Even pagans do that. But you are to be perfect, even as your Father in heaven is perfect."

In order to love someone who has hurt us we must take on the attributes of Christ.

• We must not get caught up in our emotions of ourselves. If you do you’ll find yourself with more heartache.
• We must fully realize the truth that we are not our own but Christ’s.
• We must be reliant on God's love not just on people who are unpredictable.
• We must seek direction from God.  Be in his word gaining a great depth of wisdom and "knowing" knowledge of God's word where God can help us use them in every situation that arises.

When we are able to resist what comes naturally by the mighty power of God we won't be question where we stand when its all over. You won’t feel the mental set back of your human ways or understandings and you will also be able to pray for those who have hurt you. Besides I rather hear apologies then make them, how about you?

1 Peter 3: 13-17 "Now, who will want to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you suffer for doing what is right, God will reward you for it. So don’t be afraid and don’t worry. Instead, you must worship Christ as Lord of your life. And if you are asked about your Christian hope, always be ready to explain it. But you must do this in a gentle and respectful way. Keep your conscience clear. Then if people speak evil against you, they will be ashamed when they see what a good life you live because you belong to Christ. Remember, it is better to suffer for doing good, if that is what God wants, then to suffer for doing wrong!"

Many martyrs for Christ have died and suffered for doing what was right and because of their suffering and deaths many souls have been saved.

1 John 5:3 "Loving God means keeping his commandments, and really, that isn’t difficult. For every child of God defeats this evil world by trusting Christ to give the victory. And the ones who win this battle against the world are the ones who believe that Jesus is the Son of God."

2 Timothy 3:16; 1 Peter 3:2, 3:7, 3:13-18; Ephesians 1:8; Ephesians 6:10-17, 1 Peter 4:1-19

Spiritual Truths

A friend and I were having a conversation about spiritual truths and how individuals know these truths instinctively but they either ignore these truths or interrupt them in human ways of thinking and understanding. (Find it in Romans 1)

The culture of the day has many spiritual truths. Our ear instinctively appreciates them when we hear them because God has planted them in every human soul. But throughout time we have watered down these truths into a human understanding instead of a Godly understanding. These truths that originated in and from God now have become mere words - that we have dis-attached from the owner of these truths (GOD).

Spiritual truths, to the world, have essentially become a tootsie roll pop without the tootsie roll in the center. They are sweet on the outside but no deep meaning or understanding in the inside. They are so because we have ignored the original of their meaning.

Look at these movies: The Matrix, Starwars, Lord of the Rings, Kingdom of Heaven, The Four Feathers, Narnia, Hidalgo…. We like and enjoy the message of these movies why?

God's truths are far greater and deeper then our own limited understanding and because of this they sound great to us but because we don't look to God for deeper understanding into these truths they quickly get washed away in the cares of life and are forgotten. God puts the one seeking Him (faith) on a foundation in which these truths not only sound good and make sense but also grow in deeper understanding.

Job 12:13 "But true wisdom and power are with God; counsel and understanding are his.

Read 1 Corinthians 2:12-16

We must give our lives over to God for these great truths to be revealed. He will make them plain and he will make sure we will remember them by his Holy Spirit. He will also give us clarity, direction, caution, and insight in "questionable" situations.

In every level and aspect of the human intellect there is either a certain level of vagueness of God or vagueness of the wisdom of God. And you will find that even well studied and faithful followers of Christ find there is no end to seeing the dots and greatness of God. There seems to be this constant turning key of knowledge that allows us to see a bit more into the endless insight, enlightenment and encouragement of God as we stay mindful and reliant on God and his love and grace.

A love and grace that we should not take lightly or for granted.

A journey of Christian faith brings spiritual truths to light and helps us grow in our assurance, peace and love that God has for us.

In a world of limited understandings, who dares to reach your hand to lead you and help you see the truth? Who?

Jesus says this:

John 10:9-10 "Yes, I am the gate. Those who come in through me will be saved. Wherever they go, they will find green pastures. The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give life in all it’s fullness."

John 14:6 Jesus told him, "I am the way, the truth and the life. No one can come to the Father except through me. If you had known who I am, then you would have known who my Father is. From now on you know Him and have seen Him!"

Jesus sends the Holy Spirit to those who call on Him as Lord and Savior. He is our foundation and where true understanding comes from.

John 16:13-14 "When the Spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all truth. He will not be presenting his own ideas; he will be telling you what he has heard. He will tell you about the future. He will bring me glory by revealing to you whatever he receives from me."

Why God Allows Pain

A relative recently sent this to me in an email and I thought I would share it with you.

A man went to a barbershop to have his hair cut and his beard trimmed. As the barber began to work, they began to have a good conversation. They talked about so many things and various subjects. When they eventually touched on the subject of God, the barber said: "I don't believe that God exists."

"Why do you say that?" asked the customer.

"Well, you just have to go out in the street to realize that God doesn't exist. Tell me, if God exists, would there be so many sick people? Would there be abandoned children? If God existed, there would be neither suffering nor pain. I can't imagine a loving a God who would allow all of these things."

The customer thought for a moment, but didn't respond because he didn't want to start an argument.

The barber finished his job and the customer left the shop. Just after he left the barbershop, he saw a man in the street with long, stringy, dirty hair and an untrimmed beard. He looked dirty and unkempt. The customer turned back and entered the barber shop again and he said to the barber: "You know what? Barbers do not exist."

"How can you say that?" asked the surprised barber. "I am here and I am a barber! And I just worked on you!"

"No!" the customer exclaimed. "Barbers don't exist because if they did, there would be no people with dirty long hair and untrimmed beards, like that man outside."

"Ah, but barbers DO exist! What happens is that people do not come to me."

"Exactly!"- affirmed the customer. "That's the point! God, too, DOES exist! What happens is that people don't go to Him and do not look for Him. That's why there's so much pain and suffering in the world."

From: "Faith is a journey, not a destination."

Sidenote to this email:
I think suffering does happens to those people who believe in God but it's a person's level of dependence (or faith) on God in how a person will successfully and unsuccessfully get through it. There is a book in the bible called Job. God called him righteous and a friend of God. He suffered more then most of us can even imagine but it was his dependence, reliance and belief in God that got him through it. Job's life was to prove to Satan that even when God's people suffer for reasons beyond their understanding - their faith in God still remains strong.

God has given us all a choice to love and know Him. He doesn't want us to perish in the fires of hell - by us not believing in his Son Jesus Christ, who paid for our sins and made us acceptable by His own blood. He also didn't want his creation to be forced to love Him -because what kind of love and relationship would that be then? God paid the price for us by giving His Son, Jesus Christ, to die a criminals death on a cross for us. And Jesus' obedience to His Father and his love for us made him give up his life for us. Jesus died for you and me and rose again to prove that he was God's son and - so we could have the fullness of life and eternity in heaven and not hell. He was the messiah that all the prophets of old had talked about in the bible. Jesus was the ultimate sign of God's love for us. God and Jesus have done all the work for us to come to him and it's only our choice to believe or not.

God also has given us a choice to do things that are wrong or do things that are right (to sin or not sin). These things are spelled out in the bible. God hates sin. For us to be right in God's sight is to strive to do right with the help of God's Holy Spirit and depend on Jesus Christ as our "interceder and sole priest" for the forgiveness of our sins. There are no payments to get your mother, father, brother, sister, or uncle Joe's big toe or anything else out of hell. It was their faith in Christ that saves them - NOTHING else. Jesus was our payment and to say we can buy someone's salvation over God's only son's body is CRAZY!

Bad things (also) happen to the innocent because individuals choose to sin which affect other people. They choose to drink and drive. They choose to kill and steal. They choose to have prematerial sex. They choose to have to multiple partners who may carry and spread diseases such as herpes and HIV and AIDs. They choose drugs over their own children. They choose to believe in a false god who tells them to kill millions of people. They choose to pick and choose what they want to believe in God like He is some salad bar god. They choose to rape. They choose to hold on to all their hurts, worries and anxieties. They choose to believe more in their circumstances then the power of God. They choose to not listen to God and not believe in what God says is true. We curse only ourselves in our non-belief in God the Father, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit. Innocent people get poked and stabbed by the thorns of others because "these" others don't have their eyes focused on God but themselves and their situation.

Does pain allow us to see in the mirror? Here's an example: If a person says they are a Christian and then they get crushed by someone- what is going to come out of their mouth and actions? Is it going to be something sweet or something bitter? Is it something that Christ would approve of or not? If it isn't something we know God wouldn't approve, then we know we need go to God to and have him minister to us and encourage us to do better.

Pain also shows us all that we are in need of help and we need to give that pain to God instead of holding onto it. Have you noticed that we aren't vessels capable of carrying around hurt and pain? We don't function the way God wants us to - when we hold on to the hurt and heavy burdens. God made us very dependent on him but when we try to handle hurt and pain ourselves we don't do a very good job (Frankly we stink at it) and often it affects others around us.

Well I am sure there are more reasons why their is pain in this world but this is what I was given.