I started writing this morning about failure and the humble hope that arises from such occasions in our life when we come to God in our failure. It, being my day to carpool, I stopped writing, picked up and dropped the kids off at school, got some gas and on my return trip home flipped on the radio and there Dr. David Jeremiah was talking about failure.
It was a reassuring message in just the right season. God who knows everything about us, even when we will flip on radio, wants to reassure us of his love even in our failures.
I hope I have never made it sound like I never failed because I would be a liar. Failure has helped me succeed and regain focus in my life many times. I don’t pretend to understand all of God’s ways and workings and how failure works to our benefit in our lives but God knows just as certain successes encourage us he also knows what failures bring about Godly change and perspective in our life.
This last weekend was one such occasion of failure in my life. I let an unsettled topic and discussion divert my attention off of Christ. I felt like I was being forced into a decision I didn’t feel comfortable with. I felt pressured, challenged and maybe even manipulated to conform to the wants and needs of others. I felt as if my opinion and reasons were being questioned to the point I felt like my opinion really didn’t matter. I felt like I wasn’t getting any adequate support and had to defend myself. I felt like I was being labeled as biased unfair and unreasonable. All that seemed to matter was people getting what they wanted not considering all that would be involved.
And in feeling this slew of negativity I got really frustrated to the point I vocalized it in an angry manner. I didn't curse or swear or punch a hole in the wall or break anything but I was thoroughly upset. You know when you are so upset and you start to have those conversations in your head and you just blurt out whatever is on your mind. And everyone else is going "Where the heck did that come from?" That is what I was doing? You don't think straight when you are angry.
"Hostility, quarreling, outbursts of anger, division." had taken over.
Of course when conflicts arise "like these" they aren’t just behind closed doors. They happen at just the right moment like as you're heading to church to teach, bible study, Sunday school, do a sermon, go to a friend’s house or out to dinner.
Others, who shouldn’t be involved in the discussion, are hearing the conflict which brings more adversity, pressure, prejudices, and lines drawn in the sand. I say "sand" because typically when you get to this mental state a foundation of sand is all you have and quickly the storm washes the sandy foundation away making every thing crash to the ground. You step down off of the Christ foundation which is the rock onto your own understanding and it doesn't matter what you seem to say or do because you aren't centering your heart on Christ and when you don't do that.... your godly communication and ways of handling the situation take a long hike.
Was the devil involved? I am sure to some extent. He knows exactly what issue or sore subject to pursue and suggest- to strike at the most opportune time. He knows not just your book of likes and dislikes, he knows your schedule and what you are going to teach, he knows if your head isn’t completely in the game and when to throw and bring up that unsettled topic of discussion your way. He knows what will get your attention or divert your attention. And once he persuades you to hit that first domino, he watches the rest of the dominoes fall as he suggests everything from past failures, how others might see your value, how no one sees your efforts and sacrifices, and piles on misinterpretation, guilt, accusation, anger, imaginations, and self- pity to the point you start to question your value and ability in any role. You just want to throw your hands in the air and give up seeing all that has taken place.
That being said, I have found that after situations like this, where it seems Pandora’s box has been opened, we who have Christ- still have hope. Nothing is hopeless. Most people would give up but not us. Why?
Paul writes: “I don’t understand myself at all, for I really want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. Instead, I do the very thing I hate. I know perfectly well that what I am doing is wrong, and my bad conscience shows that I agree that the law is good. But I can’t help myself, because it is sin inside me that makes me do these evil things. I know I am rotten through and through so far as my old sinful nature is concerned. No matter which way I turn, I can’t make myself do right. I want to, but I can’t. When I want to do good, I don’t. And when I try not to do wrong, I do it anyway. But if I am doing what I don’t want to do, I am not really the one doing it; the sin within me is doing it. It seems to be a fact of life that when I want to do what is right, I inevitably do what is wrong. I love God’s law with all my heart. But there is another law at work within me that is at war with my mind. This law wins the fight and makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me. Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin? Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ the Lord. So you see how it is: In my mind I really want to obey God’s law, but because of my sinful nature I am a slave to sin. So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. For the power of the life-giving Spirit has freed you through Christ Jesus from the power of sin that leads to death.” Romans 7:15-8:2
So Paul excusing sin and saying we can go right ahead and sin whenever we feel like it, of course not.
He saying that when you do fall into sin- you have an advocate in Jesus Christ to free you from that sin, which gives us the hope of Jesus Christ to continue on in the faith. If we did not have this hope how in the world could we continue in our Christian faith? Our faith would be a sham and a counterfeit. There would be nothing to encourage us without Jesus Christ as our Savior. We could only looked forward to hell and death not eternal life in heaven.
And if there is one who looks upon others in judgment for their failure and lack of devotion to God, watch out.
“This is the message we heard from Jesus and now declare to you: God is light, and there is no darkness in him at all. So we are lying if we say we have fellowship with God but go on living in spiritual darkness; we are not practicing the truth. But if we are living in the light, as God is in the light, then we have fellowship with each other, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, cleanses us from all sin. If we claim we have no sin, we are only fooling ourselves and not living in the truth. But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness. If we claim we have not sinned, we are calling God a liar and showing that his word has no place in our hearts.” 1 John 1:5-10
Just look at all the people great and small in the bible who have failed because of their sinful nature yet God chose to forgive them and relieve them of their burdens so they could continue on to preach on the Good News.
Jesus told this story to some who had great self-confidence and scorned everyone else: “Two men went to the Temple to pray. One was a Pharisee, and the other was a dishonest tax collector. The proud Pharisee stood by himself and prayed this prayer: ‘I thank you, God, that I am not a sinner like everyone else, especially like that tax collector over there! For I never cheat, I don’t sin, I don’t commit adultery, I fast twice a week, and I give you a tenth of my income.’
But the tax collector stood at a distance and dared not even lift his eyes to heaven as he prayed. Instead, he beat his chest in sorrow, saying, ‘O God, be merciful to me, for I am a sinner.’ I tell you this sinner, not the Pharisee, returned home justified before God. For the proud will be humbled, but the humble will be honored.” Luke 18:9-14
Hope stirred up out of trouble and times of failure sometimes does a heart good. I found after my ungodly actions, I was more angry with myself then anything else or anyone else in the situation… even if the situation did or didn't get settled I was going to be angry with myself for acting the way I did.
As a biblical teacher and Christian I knew better but the only option I had to relief myself from my failure was to turn my failure over to God and asked for his forgiveness. This goes with saying, try to make it right with those you have wronged by your ungodly actions as well.
Admitting failure releases any commitment to carry on a front. It frees you from your sin. Failure can become as Dr. Jeremiah puts it a mean, vicious, unmerciful giant and a slave to fear of failure in your life. Being human we are going to fail but what counts the most is where we take that failure and what we do with that failure.
Let this be encouraging. There are people who act as if sin doesn't bother them but when they face God they will be very concerned about their unforgiven sin. There are people who don't want to come to God because of sin but they have it all wrong. You come to God to forgive you of your sin. A Christian doesn't just know it is wrong to sin but "hates it" when they do sin. Exposed or not exposed, sin should bother the Christian until they ask for God's forgiveness. God is also the place where we give our failures to him. Knowing you are imperfect in the flesh makes you fully aware of your need for Jesus Christ.
Had a friend tell me that when he was younger, he was "sleeping with" a woman. They weren't married and when he got saved it became apparent to him that it was sin to have "sexual relations" with a woman before marriage. Conviction came over him and they were married soon after.
Maybe we should look at ourselves as the criminal on the cross next to Jesus. He knew he was going to die. He knew he was going to have to face God for his sins. He could do nothing to make it right with God. He was nailed on a cross and he knew he was going to hell unless he had an advocate to plead for him in heaven. And in humble failure and in faith he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your Kingdom.”
And Jesus replied, “I assure you, today will be with me in paradise.” Luke 23:42-43
We all know this but I will put here anyway because it brings comfort.
“For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life. God did not send his Son into the world to condemn it, but to save it. There is no judgment awaiting those who trust him. But those who do not trust him have already been judged for not believing in the only Son of God. Their judgment is based on this fact: The light from heaven came into the world, but they loved the darkness more than the light, for their actions were evil. They hate the light because they want to sin in darkness. They stay away from the light for fear their sins will be exposed and they will be punished. But those who do what is right come to the light gladly, so everyone can see that they are doing what God wants.” John 3:16-21
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