Addressing Hurt

Hurt that is not dealt with properly can solidify into a wedge.   It then can be driven downward by the splitting maul of our emotions and divide.

I believe the best comforter in hurt is God for no one understands you better then he does.  He can minister to you in ways people just can’t minister to you.

I believe hurt heals with the “choice” to forgive.  That choice to forgive puts us in a position to draw from Christ to forgive others and even ourselves.

Forgiveness starts with a “choice”.   This choice then manifests through God into forgiveness.  You and I have heard some horrible stories of victims forgiving those who hurt them and the world can’t understand this because forgiveness doesn’t come from the world’s point of view who screams out for revenge and continues the cycle of hate but this understanding comes from God who manifests that forgiveness in the person who chooses to forgive. 

I believe one of the reasons people don’t forgive is because they don’t know whom to go to help them forgive – who is God.

I believe another the reason people don’t forgive is because of pride.   They are afraid if they forgive someone they will look weak in their own eyes and other peoples.   Pride is the same reason why people don’t come to Christ.  Pride is why they will continue to hurt … because they won’t give it up for the power of forgiveness.   Hurt that isn’t given to Christ turns into something much worse in a person’s soul.   It turns to all kinds of hate, resentment and even guilt. 

People in this world think it looks “tougher, bolder, deserved,” to hold onto hate but in truth hate the easy way out.   Think if God used that excuse and justification on us… none of us would be going to heaven because He would not had sent Jesus Christ for our sake. 

 “For all have sinned; all fall short of God’s glorious standard.  Yet now God in his gracious kindness declares us not guilty.   He had done this through Christ Jesus, who has freed us by taking away our sins.  For God sent Jesus to take the punishment for our sins and to satisfy God’s anger against us.  We are made right with God when we believe that Jesus shed his blood, sacrificing his life for us…..”  Romans 3:23-25

People’s pride makes it so they love the sin of hatred more then coming to God to manifest the power of forgiveness in their life.  They love the sin more then they love God.  They love the approval of people more then the approval of God. 

I can’t help but think of Corrie Ten Boom, a Christian, who is thrown into a dirty dismal Nazi concentration camp where her beloved father and sister die in the hands of the Nazis.   She later encounters a few of those former Nazis in her older age and she chooses to forgive them. And the choice to forgive manifests forgiveness in her in an instant and both are healed of those past evils and injustices.   

I think of the victim of rap that forgives her rapist.

I think of the parent who forgives the drunk driver for killing their child.

I think of the child who forgives the parent for being absent or abusive.

I think of the husband or wife who forgives the cheating spouse.

I think of Stephen who while he was being stoned prayed, “Lord Jesus, receive my spirit” and “Lord, don’t charge them with this sin!” and then he died.  Acts 7:59

Then I think of God who has forgiven our sins because his son’s sacrifice on the cross for our sins which made it possible to come to God, become a child of God, and learn to live “in” God’s love and Spirit.

When we don’t give our hurt to God but carry it, what does hurt turn into?  What is produced?

“If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you.  But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins. “ Matthew 6:14-15

Hurt that is not dealt with properly will turn into something that will torture and torment you.  It will stick you in invisible self-created prison.  Your body will be free to roam but your mind and heart will be chained… stuck in that prison cell you created by not dealing with your hurt properly.  Some of the obvious chains of the mind and heart are the want to withdraw, to go some place not be hurt anymore, a low self-esteem, denial, depression, anxiety, fear, anguish, being continually defensive and so on.     

People try to cover up hurt with sexual immorality, drugs, impure thoughts, idolatry, participation in demonic activities, hostility, quarreling, jealousy, out bursts of anger, self-ambition, envy, drunkenness, wild parties, division, and other kinds of sin. 

Hurt - if not dealt with properly will not allow you to function properly and will not allow you to draw from God’s goodness. 

Christ Jesus is our comforter when it comes to hurt.  He is our burden bearer.   He is our source of comfort and where we can appropriately work through the hurt with him.  In Christ he reminds us of what we should do and the proper mindset we should have so when it is time to address the person who has hurt us, we can do it in a godly manner.

Sometimes just addressing the situation with Jesus we get over the hurt or offense like a little child who so easily forgives.

Through Jesus we may see our fault in the situation.   We may see where we might have jumped to presumption and conclusions of our own.   We may see the reason we were hurt was because we didn’t mind our own business and got involved in the affairs of others, which only added fuel to the hot flames, which were then spewed onto us.   We maybe able see something from that person’s point of view and understand why they acted the way they did.   (It wasn’t us but something affecting their mind and heart which caused them to suddenly act so grossly and ungodly.  Hurt people hurt people.)  Sometimes we may never understand why people act the way they do.   We could kick the bushes to find what spills out but why?   Sometimes it better we don’t know and just continue to live our life in a godly manner regardless of what goes on around us.

We find we have to love people who hurt us again and again like pagan or corrupt tax collectors or else that hurt will eat away at us and make us hateful and resentful towards them.    They won’t admit fault.   They won’t admit speaking negatives behind our back to others.  They won’t admit thinking the worse of you.  They won’t admit they did this or that.   We love them, forgive them but there is some restraint from now on when it comes to those individuals.  We don’t allow them in that tender sensitive place in our heart and instead we place Jesus there- where he should have been from the very start. 

I guess we wouldn’t see where we need Jesus in all the different places in our heart if the hurts never came.  So in a strange way we can be grateful to those who have hurt us because they have made us stronger in Christ Jesus.

When someone’s trash falls out of his or her garbage truck and lands in our driveway you and I have a choice in how we are going to deal with it.   We can either make that trash our own or give it Christ.

You can't be given authority over your hurt unless you submit and give the authority you think you have for your hurt to Christ.   Jesus says, "And I have given you authority over all the power of the enemy, and you can walk among snakes and scorpions and crush them.   Nothing will injure you." Luke 10:19

Hurt heals with the choice to forgive.  That choice to forgive puts us in a position to draw from Christ to forgive others and even ourselves.